At Least Someone is Working

Hello from the unemployed front! We are in week two of all being under the same roof all the time. And while H has turned his job search into a full time job and I'm plugging away at all my little unpaid, ahem! someone throw me a bone here!, gigs we are for all intensive purposes a dual no-income household. Kick ass.Except T.D.She is apparently working. All the time. Whenever I ask her what she is doing, be it playing with Play-Doh or helping me sort laundry she tells me, "I'm working Mama! I'm working!" I don't have the heart to tell her we can't pay her for her services.She thinks we are working too. Yesterday morning as I cleaned the shower she came over and inspected my workmanship, hands on hips and intoned, "Mama working. Mama is working..." Funny, I thought when I quit that … [Read more...]

Oh Look! A Mommy Blog!

Because someone actually requested I post these....TA DA it's T.D. in all her uber-serious first hair cut glory.BEFORE Yes, that is a Red Sox cheerleader uniform. Suck it, I won the Spirit stick as a kid at Cheer Camp.DURINGIt is as if she is watching EVERY hair being cut. I think she made the stylist nervous with that steely gaze. Either that or she is barely breathing for fear that what the dog Lex told her about hair salons is actually true. "Kid, you go there, your hairs don't come back. They cut you kid, they cut you..."AFTER Aww, Porkchop got her hair 'did. Now I'm going to clean up the cuteness induced barf off the laptop. This is truly a Mommyblog. … [Read more...]

Pffft… Who needs sleep?!

We don't need a new baby to give us sleepless nights. Nope. We have T.D. a.k.a. the Sleep Torturer. Just like her name, the Tiny Dictator, she has blossomed into a czar who makes sleeping four hours in a row seem like bliss. For example:I pass out at 7:30 p.m. last night. Lucky me. Sleep when baby sleeps right? Except baby is two and not napping in the afternoon and throwing a Goebbels-sized fit about going to bed. Somehow though the pregnancy hormones make it impossible for me to stay up any longer. I wake up two more times before 9 p.m. and officially turning in. 11:13 p.m.- The dictator arises. She is dissatisfied with her bumble bee blanket. How dare we try to provide extra warmth with such an inferior blanket. Rather than kick if off herself she just wails until we take it … [Read more...]

What’s with the Peeing?

Seriously folks. Lately, I could easily say that today is brought to you by the letter, 'P'. It is not just me. I know that I'm waking up a bazillion times a night now to use the head but there is also the dog incident.Now this-4:36 a.m.- Crying. There is loud wailing come from just behind T.D.'s door. Holy hell! I just got back to sleep and into dream world after my last pee break. Why me?! Why isn't H even moving?! I think he is fake sleeping. Curse him! I throw off the blankets and head across the hall to investigate.4:39 a.m.- There T.D. stands head hanging low looking upset and a tad ashamed if that is possible at this ungodly hour. I crouch to her level and ask what is wrong. She is soaked. From tummy to ankle in pee. It's cold too. My super sleuthing skills deduce that she must have … [Read more...]

Overheards

Dinner time, our house, last night...T.D. swipes a fork from the table at lightening speed and quickly hides it on her person.Me: This isn't prison, put the fork back on the table!H tries to keep from spitting food out of his mouth.Moments later T.D. has swiped another fork and poked herself in the face with it. Me: And that's why we don't use forks as weapons or anything else other than as eating utensils...Immediately I'm reminded, as was H, by his snorting laughs of the Arrested Development episodes in which the father teaches his children lessons using the one-armed man. … [Read more...]

What is Pink and Squishy and Family-Friendly? BARBAPAPA!

Sure you have your Cabbage Patch Kids, The Golden Books, your Strawberry Shortcake, throw in some Winnie the Pooh or Where the Wild Things Are and you have yourself many childhood favorites. All things many of us look back on with happy nostalgia. However, it was while I was visiting Paris during my pregnancy that I discovered a toy in a French department store that brought back much of my childhood to me. It was Barbapapa! I knew instantly I had to have him. Excited and in utter disbelief (this toy is still popular?!) I had him rung up at the register and brought him home to await the arrival of my daughter, T.D. That and Holzspielzeug für Kinder are my favorite toys I bought for my daughter. As a kid Saturday morning cartoons dawned early in my house. Barbapapa (the cartoon is based … [Read more...]

She’s Crafty

THUD!CRASH!BANG!Footsteps can be heard running overhead with the sound of hysterical Joker-esque laughter following it. Yelling quickly ensues. It sounds like an old Adam West Batman episode is at play in my house. Aah, nap time!That crash was her pink plastic pig. The thud? A pile of books she has unceremoniously dropped from her bed.The bang is new. I'll have to investigate.Some people remove all furniture from their toddler's room when these things occur. I've seen many a bare toddler room. I wonder where they put all the kids stuff. Her grandparents freak out and fear for her life and I do too a little bit but I feel that even if we removed all T.D.'s furniture she would still find some way to climb, jump and make quite a commotion. I would have to rip the windowsill off the window and … [Read more...]

Poof! You’re Two!

From this to thisin what seems like 0 to 60 in no time flat.Look at you, you are two today. Because of that, I suppose I should write some sappy hearts and flowers post about how it is hard to believe that two years ago on this very day, you my sweetie face munchkin dumpling with cheeks so cute your Aunt E wants to bite them, was born. Right, then. Let’s get started shall we? I think that’s what the midwife said when I asked if it was OK to push. To T.D., my tiny dictator, who I wouldn’t have any other way. I love everything about you no matter what I may say under clenched teeth and furrowed brow. I love your big brown eyes that mirror my own. I love your tiny teeth and even the fangs. Actually, I am quite proud of those and I must say, a bit envious. You have the most infectious … [Read more...]

She’s Two- does she really need that party?

T.D. turns two on Sunday. It's T.D. the 2.0 version. As the date draws near I have begun to feel real anxiety about my lack of planning for her big day. There will be no party. Only cake. No balloons, no company invading our home for hours with little tykes to hurl cake around. We’ll take pictures as she blows out the candles, if she even does that and we’ll make a fuss, but that is all.We thought about taking her to lunch but her favorite eatery, except Chick Fil A is closed on Sundays. We thought about a lot of things and came to the decision that we not only wouldn't go nuts on a party but we would not be buying her loads of presents. Christmas was only two months ago.When I look at what we’ve bought her thus far for presents I feel like I’m looking at birthday gifts from the … [Read more...]