It's true that I've been known to "think" in Facebook before. Now I'm apparently dreaming in Facebook. I woke up this morning only to realize that in my dreams last night I had taken a job at Facebook. OK, I might also be reading too many online Bachelor (on the wings of loooovvve..) forums lately but that's not the point. As I spent my first week getting acclimated in my new job at FB, what I did I'm not entirely sure, I realized that all the people I worked with were people I had had 'friended'. For reals, y'all. This dream was a straight up social media nightmare.Everywhere I turned in my office I saw someone's goofy profile picture. Status quotes hung above their heads changing frequently as they posted yet again another mind-numbing … [Read more...]
Can You Feel That? It’s the Awesomeness.
Scene: H and I are enjoying a moment of quiet. Also known as bedtime for the kiddies. We're discussing upcoming events in our lives, including Blogher. H: You know, you should really post more about how awesome I am. I raise an eyebrow. H: I should also leave more comments because my awesomeness would totally radiate out from the computer. On another note I had what can only be described as a pre-blogher anxiety dream. I was traveling to Chicago from Virginia by train. How much would that sucketh? I missed my connecting train and the station, which at some point was floating on a sea of icebergs, lost my luggage. To top it all off some blogger I hate (who does not actually exists) was on my train with an ex-boyfriend of mine. I decided to be sweet and nice and chatted with … [Read more...]
Overheards- The Gross Out Edition
H and I were having a bit of a chat last night and I asked him what some line was from the film 'In Bruges' that I thought was so funny. He recited it and I made the comment that, "Yeah, that one guy in it just never meets a good end in any movie he's in. I mean he falls from the tower and lands with a splat and then there's 'Gangs of New York' where he just gets brained in the barber shop with his own club. Sick!"H: Thanks for all that nice mental imagery before I go to bed and head off to dreamland. Why don't you call me tomorrow at lunch time and tell me all about your first period. How's that?Me: Oh. Sorry. Yeah, that type of stuff just doesn't bother me, does it? Yet, I was strangely disgusted by Krusty the Clown going into the wood chipper on The Simpson's today. Weird. … [Read more...]
Harry Potter Thinks I Need to Clean My Tub
They say that with pregnancy comes cravings, the frequent need to pee and a host of other fun things that we have either forgotten about or never experienced. Do they ever mention the bizarre host of dreams though?Since becoming 'with child' as H calls it I've -Walked in on Harry Potter making acne medication/potions in my guest bathroom only to then hear him complain about the dirty state of my bathtub. My father then entered the room and said, "Eehh, it's not so bad. I've used it plenty. Relax, Harry!" Hmmph. Good enough for me and I told 'ol Potter there that if he didn't like the tub then he could just 'magic' it clean himself and left.Had Michael Caine over for dinner. He wore a blue blazer, white shirt and a gold ascot. We had loads of fun and it was a fine evening had by all. I … [Read more...]
Mayday! Mayday! Mom Down!
Sometimes I wish, secretly hope for and yes, beg for a Command Center of sorts that would monitor my home (only for purposes of good and well-being) from a remote location. They would be able to hear and see what is going on and see what a nightmare lunch time can be. Yeah, it's not always that cute when your child smears sour cream on EVERYTHING. Life with kids is not always one cute photo op after another. Just when it looks like Mom is about to lose it a little alarm would go off in my house sending out a signal of distress to the Command Center. The Command Center would be on high alert on the days I'm alone for long hours with a million things to do. Like when my husband has decided to change plans or just not call to say he isn't bringing people by our house for a visit, people that … [Read more...]
Saturday Morning Wake Up Call
I had a dream last night. One of those dreams where I know I need to listen. Two old men sat at a picnic table by a lake. They were the gruff no nonsense types with the unmistakable air that only retired cops possess. There was nothing film noir about them or the situation. I got the feeling I needed to heed what they were saying though. Girlie needed to listen up as what they were telling me was incredibly important. One more thing. They were dead. They told me that I knew what I had to do. I had to get closure. I needed to do that in two ways. One I needed to find out what happened. I know cryptic right? But I knew exactly what they were talking about. The second thing being that I had to write about it. I had to take the two books I had already started that are in a similar vein and … [Read more...]
A little bloodbath with your coffee?
Since I can remember, as far back as the age of three or so, I have always had very vivid and extremely violent dreams. It seems to run in the family. You want to taste something? Go ahead. It can be done in my dreams. In my dreams colors are extreme, especially red and black. They are usually very prominent factors too. Long hallways, dark forests, vasts empty lands, old houses full of dampness, caverns, caves, and tight enclosures abound. I don't need to see a horror flick for that type of action. I see it nearly every night in my dreams. Why do I get the insane priviledge of witnessing skin peeling off someone? Torture that is in the extreme and never to be believed? I wish I knew. I wish I knew where my mind gets these images as I hate horror movies and will not watch them. I … [Read more...]