Day One- I Feel Like a Statistic

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post from June 19, 2008.The front door opened. Startled I looked up to find my husband coming home from work early yesterday. I was about to take a work related phone call so I just briefly asked him what was up. He perched himself on the edge of the kitchen counter and said, "It's done. Over. I got laid off."Immediately, I had to grip the counter myself and keep from feeling as if my brain was doing a fade to black sort of thing. If there wasn't already a baby growing inside me it would have felt as if my stomach was being kicked in. Pummeled. I hear the words being calmly stated, "Two weeks severance...one month of insurance...", and my mind just reels. How are we going to survive? I feel like one of those brief profiles you … [Read more...]

That Dirty Degree

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms. Original post date May 21, 2008.A while back I wrote a post for a blog exchange based around songs that meant something to you. I picked Still Dirrty by Christina Aguilera. Why? Because I am. As I mention in the post, despite passing a child through my "special" place I still feel sexy. OK, I admit, not every day and it is certainly harder right now as I find myself in the throes of pregnancy and being caught between my old clothes and maternity wear, but I do. Most days I feel damn sexy.There are a host of books, websites and even social networking groups about how to be a 'Hot Mom' and redefine yourself after motherhood. Why do you think all those makeover shows thrive? Most of them are Moms needing a lift. I admit, it is hard not to lose … [Read more...]

The Avon Walk- A Restoration of Hope

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date May 8, 2008.  It's walk weekend again so I'm posting this.In some ways I am still reeling from completing the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer this past weekend. Maybe it is due to the surprise visit I had from a dear old friend or simply the fact that my sleeping bag is still airing out on my deck. However I may be feeling, it was worth it! Every blister, every painful step, even the rest stops that lacked water and Gatorade it was worth it and not just because it was the first year I did not have to lie in a puddle soaked sleeping bag all night. It was my fourth year completing the walk and the second that my aunt is cancer-free. Each year it seems the list of who I walk for just gets longer and I remind myself that … [Read more...]

Letting My Domestic Diva Out

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date April 23, 2008.The birds are chirping. The windows are open and the pollen is making its way inside my own home. What's that you say? It is time for what? Oh right. The inevitable urge I get this time each year to go all crazy lady on my house and my yard. Everything must be new! Everything must be organized! Everything must be clean, fresh and tidy! Skedaddle you dust bunnies! Be gone weeds or is that weed be gone?This year I am a bit behind. The prolonged, never-ending feeling of sickness has been pervasive in my house since I creeped into my seventh week of pregnancy. Now almost at the end of the first trimester it still drags me down into its afternoon nap time abyss. The act of unloading or loading the dishwasher … [Read more...]

New Obsessions

Cross-posted from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date April 10, 2008.I used to obsess about handbags and cute sandals. Really. Just weeks ago. Accessories and nail polishes were like air to me. These days all my creative juices seem sapped by a guppy-sized being inhabiting my lower regions. My desires for cute butt jeans and wedge heels have transferred to working myself into a lather over just the idea of a Pizza Hut pan pizza only for me. When I sit down to work all I can think of is how brownies repulse me and the idea of a nachos bell grande seems like pure bliss. My house never feels clean and I want to change my sheets daily. I yearn to plant acres of flowers and all ideas of baking, my old hobby, have been put aside. I am not pregnant. It seems in fact, that I have had a … [Read more...]

I love you, I hate you. I can’t quit you, but I must

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date January 12, 2008.  They say the average smoker quits nine times before they are seriously done.  Like everyone else I adamantly proclaim each year that I do not make new year's resolutions. No way. Not me. Never. Even this year as the clock struck twelve I denied making any. Except I lie. I have a secret. I made a resolution. I am a cliche. Call it a pact, if you will, with my spouse. We have decided to quit smoking.It is one thing to quit smoking because smokers are now deemed social pariahs. Yes, we do know it is quite unhealthy. Deadly I hear. Smoking kills more women than it does men. I know this fact as well. I also know that is incredibly hard to be a runner and smoke. Trust me on that one. For all my … [Read more...]

Trying Not to Enjoy the Silence

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date January 24, 2008.Maybe it is the January blues and I'm simply suffering from SAD. Maybe it is the fact that I have hit that glorious year mark of being a work at home mom. A WAHM who is trying to break into the freelance writing world and I look back and think, "WTF?! Have I done anything of note? What the hell do I have to do around here to get a freakin' job already." When you spend hours of your day searching for work and writing up queries that you know you have no knack for you start to get a little edgy. Then the edginess wears off and you begin to feel downright pathetic and sad. That would be right now. Over here in the corner. Yup. That is me alright. The woman wearing gray and not wanting to comb her hair. … [Read more...]

The Parents Have Left the Building

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date December 28, 2007.  I find this post fascinating now about three years later. My family is closer geographically and things aren't like this so much anymore.  It is inevitable that the holidays bring not only massive doses of overindulging of food, gifts, food and ah yes, family time. Don't get me wrong, I love it. I really do. I love having all the family over to our house for the holidays. They get to see the tot open up gift after gift and I even love the winding up to the holiday/family time. What I don't love is the unsolicited advice. I know it is well-meaning. I know it is meant to be helpful too. I also know that it will grate my nerves and that I must brace myself for it with each visit. I know that I … [Read more...]

Giving It Up For Holiday Sanity

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date December 11, 2007.Each year I make a promise to myself and to my family that I won't over do it. I won't over book us in holiday get togethers, parties and more. There will be more peaceful moments at home and enjoying each others company and less harried messes, traffic and season excesses. Each year I fail. I fail miserably. Last year I failed so badly it resulted in a teary exodus by my parents and them claiming they never wanted to stay at our house again. If that is not failure right there I don't know what is. It's also a damn fine wake up call.This year the invitations rolled in and faster than I could imagine we were booked from just before Halloween through to the new year. Before the holiday season was even … [Read more...]

Cats are the New Elves

Cross-posted and archived from DC Metro Moms.  Original post date December 5, 2007.Despite the blustery winds and newly cold weather we decided last night would be the night to get our Christmas tree. Weez wicked smaht in our house I tell ya! Wicked smaht. We bundled ourselves all up to fight the cold and our daughter suffered her first bout of starfish syndrome. You know the starfish syndrome. It's when you get all bundled up as a kid and you suddenly find your arms and legs stiffly sticking out, your head in it's hat is the point of the star and you are in effect a starfish, unable to move your limbs. Her little eyes looked out at us as we laughed ourselves silly at her plight.When we got to the nursery where we purchase our tree each year I saw something dart across my path but … [Read more...]