To all you women out there who bring your many tiny tots to the grocery store all at once I commend you. I. Just. CANNOT. Handle. It. At all.Granted, I can't seem to get the handle of the Ergo Baby while holding a purse which would free up the cart versus putting the baby carrier in there because there is NO grocery cart for people with a toddler and a young baby. None. Sure, I can use the car cart but then the seat to balance the baby carrier is always too small. I end up placing her sideways over the basket and have minimal access to the cart and ooh I'm already sweating and stressing out before I have even entered the store. Now, H can handle all this. He just sticks TD in the cart and straps Dash Two into the Baby Bjorn and goes. It's all stress and nightmares for me no matter … [Read more...]
Confessions of a Grocery Whore
Hi there loyal Mummy readers! This is Stacy, aka: The Fabulous Miss S. I am guest posting here today for our dear Mummy, Victoria who is recovering from a nasty cold and child birth.Congratulations and GET WELL!! Vicky.::I hear that the first step is admitting you have a problem? Well, I have a problem. I am a Grocery Store whore. No, I am not whoring myself at the local market, but rather, I shop at a minimum of three different stores each week and none of them know about each other. And it is leaving me a wee bit exhausted.I live in a nice little suburban area of Maryland where if I turn left out of my neighborhood I arrive at Safeway. If I go straight out of my neighborhood I come to a Shoppers Food Warehouse. Right leads me to a just-remodeled Giant and left-straight-right-left … [Read more...]
Dear Trader Joe’s
Dear Trader Joe's,It is Joe right? Not Giotto, Jose or whatever alias you might feel like going by today? I'm on to you. I will admit you snuck one by me and I'm very disappointed in you Joe. Very disappointed.When I visited your open and friendly store just last week you were chocked full of delightful supplies. Even your bathroom was clean and sweet smelling. I purchased many items from you as I am wont to do when I set foot on your premises. Each. And. Every. Time. You suck me in Joe. I am truly a sucker for you. So when I saw your delicious, fresh key lime pie I knew I had to have you. Have you I did as I proudly placed you on the register to be scanned. I placed you lovingly in my car and took you home with me. Oh beautiful not scary green key lime pie. Not too tart, not … [Read more...]
H & the Unholy Trinity
There is a reason I normally do the grocery shopping in our house. H just gets too fired up while he is there. It takes me about 45 minutes to calm him down after each excursion. I must admit that I often agree with him but once I walk through those automated doors my mind shuts off and I am all about the list and getting the heck out of there in record time. If I can do a weeks worth of shopping in under 30 I am a happy camper. H's top three reasons he isn't allowed to go to the grocery store.1. The beige factor- It gets to me too. For H, it's worse. He will rant and rail against the fact that the frozen food section consists of food that is one color only. Beige. Why? Because it's fried carbohydrates or some type of processed food that sends him into a nauseated state of despair and … [Read more...]
Creepy Man Freaks Local Mom While Shopping
News at 11.Well, not really. Here it is though. While trying to avoid/not get sucked into the 13th Ring of Hell that is my local Safeway, I decided to make a trip to a different grocery yesterday. It's where I do all my "big" shopping since Safeway seems to think its quite alright to take half the GNP from my wallet each time I visit. Seriously I sometimes think I'm funding some small nation with the amount of money I spend there.While perusing the goods, and incredibly rotten strawberries I might add, this older gentleman approached my cart. "Helloooo", he muttered a bit lasciviously. Ick. I breezed past not making eye contact and barely said a small 'hi' back. He turned around as I whizzed by and said, "I said HELLO!" Ok. Thanks. Creepy. I say Creepy because it wasn't just a friendly … [Read more...]
A Little Bit of Green
Green with Envy. I like to say that I work "really hard" on how I look. Except I don't. Oh, I may put in more than some people- I until recently kept my hair and highlights in check. I put on make up daily. Moisturize. I work out too. Except I work out sometimes sporadically or don't push myself hard enough and as I said before it's my own fault if I don't look the way I REALLY want to. I like to eat too much and I like to eat some pretty "bad for you" foods on a too frequent basis. I berate my thighs daily but so far that hasn't galvanized them to depuff and shed some poundage.Then today I found out that the oh so cute girl at my gym who I always see in practically every class has two kids. Yup. Two. She's a stick and oh by the way, she gained 60 lbs with each one. That last kiddie is all … [Read more...]
Dear Nice Lady Whom I Now Loathe
To the Woman in Front of Me at the Safeway Checkout,Hi! Remember me? The woman dripping in sweat because I was at the gym right before I dashed into our local Safeway? I also had the cranky toddler who everyone smiled at when she pointed to Matthew Mcconaughey and proclaimed, "Daddy!" Yes, that was me. I thought you were a nice smart lady. I thought you had your shit together when I got in line behind you. It was the express line after all. Fifteen items or less! You had more kids than groceries piled in your cart. We were simpatico. You were already sliding your credit card through the scanner when I dumped my greeting card and jug of organic milk on the conveyor belt. Easy peasy. Then you got confused.It wasn't the credit card processing. It was the coupon on the receipt. I know. They … [Read more...]